Fix Me: TAT: A Rocker Romance by Melanie Walker

Author:Melanie Walker [Walker, Melanie]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Published: 2018-02-06T16:00:00+00:00

I cannot see what made her think I didn’t care for her. I did, even then I remember that. I am not a complete douchebag. I want to read more but my heart breaks for the girl who loved me more than any other woman ever has and how I never knew it. I knew she didn’t like when I dated, but I hated when she did. We were always fire and gasoline, even then. Anytime anyone else had her... drove me crazy. Where she tells of her sorrow, I never did.

I read through them all, pausing trying to pinpoint the memory and as the years pass, I am fighting to read about the things I did to her. I have always known that I had a part in Jenny falling into our lifestyle, I hand fed it to her for fucks sake. I want to say that if I knew how she felt I would have stopped and begged for forgiveness and tell her to marry me. But that is because now, I see through the door that was always closed. I see her high and crying as I pass the bathroom, one I didn’t acknowledge back then for shit. I see it now, remember it with sickening clarity as I learn it was because I brushed her off to go fuck someone else.

She writes about the call from the fuel point in Idaho where Seth Venus left her. I told her she deserved it. I meant it to, I was hurt and pissed. I was wrong. I was skewed back then, I sent the money to save her and to me it was a lesson to stop fucking my friends and learn her lesson.

In some fucked up and totally ignorant way, I was jealous. I remember even then seeing her as my first serious crush, puppy love shit and I wasn’t the guy to share. But I fucked with her every chance I got and tested her loyalties. I said to go, fuck them all and I will join if I feel like it, sometimes I did and sometimes I didn’t.

The times I did, made the sex more intense because I was greedy to please her and it made me go mad seeing someone else please her. It was sadistic and masochistic, to both of us.

She talks of sucking Shame off while I took her from behind and how I asked her to do it, that turning her on made me hot... Fuck me that was the night I should have stopped the whole fucking charade and changed my way of thinking. My words were clear as day after the drugs wore off and we were spent on the floor. I asked her to please not fuck my friends. She agreed and she never did again, but I didn’t tell her it was killing me. That is was making me resent her and I needed her to contain my innocence, even at the cost of hers.

I toss the

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